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Yeabut….

Yeabut.  That’s the name I’ve given my saboteur.  What is the saboteur?  It’s that little voice that creeps up every now and again (sometimes more regularly!) and tells me I can’t do something or that I shouldn’t do something or I shouldn’t think something, blah, blah, blah.  The saboteur is that voice that tries to keep me comfortable, safe, avoid taking risks or putting myself out there.  Why do I give my saboteur a name?  Naming it makes it more real, more of an entity, and allows me to more readily recognize it’s presence.  When I can more readily recognize Yeabut’s presence I’m in a better position to counter what that voice says and minimize the influence it has on my ability to perform…in any aspect of life.  In fact, as I sit here writing this post I am acutely aware of Yeabut’s presence:

“Yea but you don’t have anything important to say.”   Ok, well, who am I to be the one that determines what is or is not deemed important to someone else?  If one person reads this and it had an impact and they found it important, that’s wonderful!  Hell, if nobody else thinks what I’m writing is important that’s ok too!

“Yea but you aren’t a writer, you can’t write posts.”  Hmmm, I’m sitting here putting pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard if we’re being literal), I know words, I know how to put words together.  I am writing!!

“Yea but people are going to judge what’s been written here when you share it.”  Ok, what’s so wrong with people reviewing and having an opinion?  That isn’t judging!!  That’s having free thought, opinions and perspectives.  It’s ok for us to all have, and accept, different thoughts, opinions and perspectives.  In fact, I believe we need more people on board with that in today’s world!

Where else does Yeabut creep up?  EVERYWHERE!!!

Yeabut likes to show up when big decisions need to be made… “Yea but if you ask someone else what they think then they might not think you’re capable”… No!  Getting other data points and points of view before making a big decision is a perfectly reasonable and rational thing to do.

Yeabut likes to show up in relationships… “Yea but if you tell them how you really feel or what you really need you might upset them.”  False!  I am not responsible for how someone chooses to feel.  I am only responsible for the words I choose to use and expressing myself in a non-offensive manner.  “Yea but leaving this relationship means another failure.  People will think you give up too easy.”… Absolutely not!  Recognizing you are in an unhealthy relationship and taking the gigantic step to walk away for your own well being is brave and it is strength.

Yeabut likes to show up with sports… “Yea but you didn’t perform as well as you wanted to”.  Maybe not, but I did learn from how I performed every time I stepped out on that floor.  I had to perform to be able to qualify to be there in the first place and that shit was hard to do!

Yeabut likes to show up with work…. “Yea but if you ask for that raise they might say no.”  I’m 100% certain to not get it if I don’t ask for it.  I am very well aware of my worth and can articulate why I deserve it.

Yeabut likes to show up when I’m coaching…. “Yea but you might not provide value to your client today.”  I do provide value each session – whether that’s big or small.  I choose to coach purely for the purpose of serving others in their quest to be a better version of their self.  It’s my only goal!

Yeabut is still here… “Yea but you’re writing too much and this will be too long for people to read.”.  Hey, it’s their choice to continue reading or not.  I feel good about finally having written all of these words because Yeabut has had me stuck for weeks over-thinking writing this!  Take that Yeabut!!!

Am I the only one with a saboteur?  Hell no!  We all have that voice!  Recognize it, name it, be aware of it….then we can better develop strategies and supports to quiet the saboteur’s voice when it becomes too loud or starts to appear too often. 

Yeabut has now left the building.  Until next time!